Who Needs a Drummer?

Hey, who needs a drummer? I can really play well. Just ask my neighbours, who often ask the Police to come listen to me playing ...

Bloodbath in Playgroup

After being heavily slammed onto the floor by Daryl (in green), Ryan (in red) retaliated by giving his adversary a good shove in his face.

Like Father, Like Son

Hey, how many times have I told you not to eat like your daddy?

Food Poisoning

The greeny substance must have been spiked. Otherwise there is no way to explain why Daryl passed out face-first onto the plate ...

It's Time to Eat!

Believe it or not, Daryl is now able to use his chopsticks to eat! And he's a lefty just like me!

Breakthrough in Medical Science

Ladies in medical consultation will no longer be embarrassed as the latest techniques allow doctors to check on the patients' health through listening to the sound of their legs, instead of their heart through a stethoscope. Daryl Cheung (inset), a veteran in eating and crying, has discovered a direct relation between the sound of a patient's legs and health, and is hopeful that such techniques will be picked up by other doctors in the near future.

I'm a Professional Salesperson

Hi, we've got some really nice shoes. Would you like to try this pair on? A pair of shocking pink slippers?

How about this one? I've been wearing them for quite a while and it's really comfortable.

Or you may prefer a pair of black high heels instead?

Global Vision

To prove that he has really gone international, Daryl did something I dare do only in my wildest dream. Namely, holding the hands of a pretty Caucasian girl under the broad daylight.

I wish I were him. That way I wouldn't be spanked by anyone for doing so.

Shopping Baby

Mommy loves cosmetics. Hm, I'd better get her some new ones!

And Daddy dresses like a piece of mess. I'd better get him some new stuff at Zara too!

I Ain't No Wendy Lee

My first piano concert went really well, except that there weren't THAT many people in attendance (my daddy and my mommy, and probably some other micro-organisms as well), and I couldn't find the middle C until the session was over ...

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

Oh my god, I can't believe I'm 16 days late!

Postcard from Paris

Dear all,

I'm doing fine in Paris, and the cafes here have really helped my blogging a lot. Next time you see me I will no longer cry for milk. Instead I will cry for coffee, borsch and baguette, which are wonderful here. Talk to you later, and Happy New Year too!

Love,

Daryl from (Cafe) Paris

Bringing down a Giraffe 101

Today I'll show you how to bring down a giraffe.

When you run into a giraffe, don't panic. Try not to stare straight into its eyes and act as if you are shy.

Then grab its neck with your right hand and slam it onto the ground, knocking it unconscious.

To make it absolutely sure, try stepping onto its head so that it won't suddenly jump up and overpower you.

Once it's lying on the ground, you may poke its eyes with your right hand, and check on its pulse with your left.

Done! Next week: Bringing down Goliath 101.

(Disclaimer: Don't worry, we are animal lovers too. No animal was harmed in the process.)

How Not to Propose to Someone (Whoever She is)

Elisabeth, will you marry me?

Huh, will you?

Hey, I'm not Elisabeth. I'm April!

Oh really? Aren't you Elisabeth? It doesn't matter. June, or whatever, will you marry me?

Latest Fashion for 2008

Designed in Italy. Available while stock lasts.

Mars Attack

Martian in blue: "#$*@#$$**%#%$#$!#@#^!##$%>*?"

Martian in pale blue: "%^@*#%@$*$@*%@*??$%#%^."

Martian in blue: "*$%#%$#^**@$#!*#$^!"

Martian in pale blue: $%!$%@^$!^$^&%$!^%#@^&!%&^!!"
Martian in blue: $%!@#^%!$%^$#%$%^!&^&^^!!!"

Daryl the Santa

"Welcome to my home, kids. Good morning!"

"Thanks for waking me up. It's not early, so I'd better call and wake up my deer. They had a wild party last night and I'm not sure they are home yet."

"First things first, some push-ups for me. You know, the presents are quite heavy. I'm quite old and I don't want to injure myself. And frankly, I don't know to whom I should claim damages if injure myself at work ..."

"Okay, fatso, I think you need a chair. Merry X'mas!"

"Whew, what a day. It's time to tuck in. Happy eating!"

Nine to Five

"Good, a new briefcase for me. I don't like the colour though. Why don't you get a pink one for me? At least it matches my shirt."

"Hey taxi!"

"Chumps, we need to maximise our profits and, well, it's 4:30 and let's call it a day."

"There is no better place than this club. I can have all the food and beverages I want, and all I have to do is to sit down and then someone will feed me!"

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ..."

Live Commentary: Friendly Match between Ryan and Daryl

Daryl: "It's a foul!"

Daryl: "Now back off 10 yards and I'll bend it like Beckham."

Ryan: "Are you alright? Sorry for the tackle. Ref, don't book me for this!"

Ryan: "Ref, I said don't book me! I'll give you all the milk powder I have."

Ryan: "Ref!"

Daryl: "Ryan, this is the key to the ref's locker and you can take away his yellow card and red card. You can take away his clothes if you want, and you may also find some pacifiers as well. I heard that the refs suck them, among other othings, really well."

Ryan: "Got it."

Daryl: "Let's play ball!"

Daryl: "Oh yeah!"

(Just to remind you that NICAM service is available for the above dialogue.)